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tags: #metoo
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I was recently called a misandrist for the first time in my life. Why? Because I told a man that men needed to “behave better”. He screamed “not all men!” At me and then demanded I show more deference and acknowledgement that there are “good guys out there”.
This was someone I considered a friend - so I tried to explain that of course there are good guys - but we don’t know who they are. We have to approach EVERY man with caution because of the constant threat of rape and abuse.
I explained that’s why we say men have privilege - because they don’t have to move through life with that constant threat. They don’t have to be on guard ALL the time. They aren’t judged by what they wear, how many kids they have, how much they drink or how late they were out at night.
He proceeded to school me that he in fact experienced No benefit from being a man. He genuinely could not comprehend that I wasn’t saying he didn’t work hard or earn whatever he had - just that it would have been HARDER had he been a woman or marginalized in another way.
Nope. I was told I hate men and that we could no longer be friends.
guys - please don’t do this. I kept my cool and tried to gently explain where I was coming from only to get berated and repeatedly told that if I didn’t do exactly as he wanted - the friendship would be cut off.
This dude proved my point and couldn’t even see it.
We KNOW it’s not all men - but it’s too many men. And we DON’T know who the safe ones are.
I’m debating writing an article about this - especially considering disabled women are far more likely to experience abuse. I’m just not sure it “fits” with Disabled Ginger. Though reproductive health is certainly something I will be diving in to.
Thoughts? Is it too far removed from my normal topics?